The Life of a Trekkie's Wife.
by Lisa Hood-Anklewicz
Every time I sit down at my computer, I have a life-sized cardboard cut-out of Brent Spiner as Data pointing a phaser at me.
The life of a Trekkie’s wife.
Unfortunately it doesn’t stop there. Captain Picard started it. The Borg repeated it. The fans made it a catch phrase. They are all correct. Resistance is futile.
I should have realized we were in trouble while we were dating. He broke a date with me because he had to stay home to watch the series finale of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. But I married him anyway.
If you’re out there now, and you’re dating someone who is a Trek fan, be wary. If you’re careful you can avoid my fate.
Eventually, you start to sit through whole episodes, because you’re bored and he has the remote. And before you know it, you know the character names. Then one day, you’re watching some other completely non-related program and a Trek actor is guest starring and you point out, by their character’s name at first, then by the actor’s name, and then you can start to name the Trek episodes that they were in or the different species (and their character names) that they played over multiple series of Trek.
Suddenly, you’re not only identifying regular actors, but guest stars as well. But the worst of all, the point of no return, is when you can name the actors who have only ever appeared under so much make up that they aren’t recognizable when they have no make up on.
You start by watching the series that interests you the most, then start putting feelers out for the others and gradually you’ve seen them all. In fact, you keep trying to come up with some sort of defence for yourself when your friends are making fun of you for still loyally watching Enterprise when they gave up on it more that a year ago. Besides, my husband gave Voyager four seasons before he stopped watching it (yes, even a Trekkie can be unhappy with Trek from time to time), so he’s got to be fair and give Enterprise the same chance.
And how do you spend New Years? A marathon of the complete seventh season of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. And when that series finale starts to wrap up and you’re in tears because you have become so attached to the characters that you don’t want it to end, you want more episodes or maybe a reunion mini-series and you start coming up with scenarios that might work to actually produce some sort of reunion.
That’s when he reminds you of how much you made fun of him for breaking your date so many years before, and he never lets you live it down.
If he’s not around to remind me that he “got me” or that he “made me a geek,” I’ve always got Data and his phaser in the corner. Sometimes I wish he would fire it.
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